yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
