mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize