i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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