It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Randomize
