why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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