on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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