i already hear my dad disowning me
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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