Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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