He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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