he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
