Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize