this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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