that's an acceptable place to lick
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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