he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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