Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
