she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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