you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
handjob tips. give me some.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
