Are we in a gay sports bar?
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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