Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
