i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
