Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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