i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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