its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
