its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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