I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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