he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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