If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
