Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
