Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize