He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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