Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
