i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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