I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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