I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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