I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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