u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
