i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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