New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
