im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I could have mohawked her pubes.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
