I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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