Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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