well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize