Redeem this text for a blowjob
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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