he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Can I ask u a weird question?
do u have the hershy squirts too?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.