You just made me feel so damn special
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
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