I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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