i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
