People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
