Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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