I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize