Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
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