where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
