i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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